Memories...

It was a really slow night tonight Ubering. My last passengers were three really nice girls, college students, and we got to talking. It was a fairly long ride and they were talking about a bad date one of them had the night before. Then one of them asked me what was the worst date I ever had and I related the following story:

It was about ten years ago, in between my first marriage and when I met Amy. I was on OKCupid and hit it off with this girl. We decided to go on a date. She told me I needed to pick her up, she didnt have a car, and she wanted me to pick her up in the front of her apartment complex. Sketchy, but OK.

I got there and she was on her phone. She got into my truck and waved hello and kept talking. We had agreed to go to a place near there so I headed to the restaurant and she kept talking. I was listening and it wasnt anything that was an emergency or anything, just regular life stuff. After about 5 minutes she got off the phone and we talked a bit, she seemed distracted and I asked if everything was OK. She said yes, and we arrived and went in to eat.

Right after we ordered, her phone rang again and she took the call. She talked until the food came and then hung up and ate. We both ordered fairly expensive dinners, I remember that, but I dont remember what we ate. We talked for maybe 10 minutes as we ate and, you guessed it, her phone rang again and she answered it. She talked as I ordered dessert and ate most of it. She talked as I told her I was going to the bathroom. She shushed me when I said that.

Oh, hell no. I bounced.

I hit the bathroom, went out the door and got into the truck. Bitch was still on her phone. I watched as the waiter brought her the check. She continued talking. I drove home.

About ten minutes later I get a text. "Where are you? The check is here!"

I was at a friends house talking BIG shit about her and laughing by this point. She told me to block her. I said no and texted back. "I'm at my friends house, thanks for dinner and being so fucking rude. I figure you can call someone to get you home, you obviously have a lot of friends who want to talk to you."

She starts blowing my phone up with texts and calls. Im playing the voicemails back for my friend and a group of people and we are all LOL'ing hard. after about half an hour the calls and texts stop. I had a nice evening among friends and went home to 3 emails full of madness at me. One more LOL, I deleted them and blocked her on my phone and OKC. That's the last I heard from her.

I do know she paid for dinner...